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4.0 

The Princess Beard

By Kevin Hearne & Delilah S. Dawson
The Princess Beard by Kevin Hearne & Delilah S. Dawson digital book - Fable

Publisher Description

This princess can shave herself! The hilarious bestselling authors of Kill the Farm Boy and No Country for Old Gnomes are back with a new adventure in the irreverent world of Pell.

Once upon a time, a princess slept in a magical tower cloaked in thorns and roses. 

When she woke, she found no Prince Charming, only a surfeit of hair and grotesquely long fingernails—which was, honestly, better than some creep who acted without consent. She cut off her long braids and used them to escape. But she kept the beard because it made a great disguise.

This is not a story about finding true love’s kiss—it's a story about finding yourself. On a pirate ship. Where you belong.

But these are no ordinary pirates aboard The Puffy Peach, serving under Filthy Lucre, the one-eyed parrot pirate captain. First there’s Vic, a swole and misogynistic centaur on a mission to expunge himself of the magic that causes him to conjure tea and dainty cupcakes in response to stress. Then there’s Tempest, who’s determined to become the first dryad lawyer—preferably before she takes her ultimate form as a man-eating tree. They’re joined by Alobartalus, an awkward and unelfly elf who longs to meet his hero, the Sn’archivist who is said to take dictation directly from the gods of Pell. Throw in some mystery meat and a dastardly capitalist plot, and you’ve got one Pell of an adventure on the high seas!

In this new escapade set in the magical land of Pell, Delilah S. Dawson and Kevin Hearne lovingly skewer the tropes of fairy tales and create a new kind of fantasy: generous, gently humorous, and inclusive. There might also be otters.

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The Princess Beard Reviews

4.0
Rolling on the Floor Laughing Face“This was a really fun read. All of the characters were fun and funny, even if I wanted to slap Vic in the beginning. I loved all the puns, jokes, and pop culture references sprinkled throughout the story especially the ones that took me a bit to understand (like Frigg). The whole plot with the MEATUM was somewhat unexpected but very fun to read, especially as it gave us Otto and made for some very sympathetic pirates, after all who can fault pirates for rescuing otters. All of the characters’ storylines were fun, but I really loved Vic and Tempest’s and their relationship to each other. Vic learning to accept himself and even enjoy his sweet side and Tempest realize she cares enough about her friends to risk transforming was such sweet sections. Overall a great and amusing time”
Rolling on the Floor Laughing Face“This is the sort of palette cleanser I needed. With lines like “never trust a sand witch” and places such as The Morningwood, this series is guaranteed to make you laugh (as long as you like puns).”
“I finished this book merely because I wanted to be able to write an honest review. This book tried way to hard to be funny. Way to hard. All the jokes and references fell flat. I was particularly angry about the Lawyer School chapter. This was such an obvious rip off of Harry Potter. I must be honest, I have bo idea how this book has received such a high overall rating”

About Kevin Hearne

Delilah S. Dawson is the author of the New York Times bestseller Star Wars: Phasma, Hit, Servants of the Storm, the Blud series, the creator-owned comics Ladycastle and Sparrowhawk, and the Shadow series (written as Lila Bowen). She lives in Florida with her family and a fat mutt named Merle.

Kevin Hearne hugs trees, pets doggies, and rocks out to heavy metal. He also thinks tacos are a pretty nifty idea. He is the New York Times bestselling author of The Iron Druid Chronicles, the Ink & Sigil series, and the Seven Kennings series, and is co-author of The Tales of Pell with Delilah S. Dawson.

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